I then decided to reply to him and see where this conversation would lead.
‘Hey, are you also a firefighter?’ asked I.
‘No, just a paramedic’, answered he.
‘So you work every other day.’
‘Yes and at my job right now.’
‘So if there’s no calls you sit by the computer.’
‘Yes, how do you know?’
‘I was once friend’s with a firefighter and had the opportunity to visit the station where he worked. His colleagues were studying, watching TV, or surfing the net. It was a nice experience.’
‘The guy or the station?’
‘So what happened that you two are not together?’
‘It just didn’t work out. Listen, I had a long day, so maybe we’ll chat some more tomorrow’, concluded I.
It was true that I had a stressful day, but wasn’t in the mood in getting into details about an experience that happened a long time ago (see ‘You Can Be My Hero’).
That particular guy was like the second I met right out of what I’ve always referred to as ‘my past life’. Right now I don’t need to dwell on the reasons of why we stopped even having a conversation.
There was a time when I was upset about the whole incident, but now it just feels like a blur, or perhaps something lived out of a movie or something.
I have no regrets about it or feel any more anger towards him or the moment. In simple words, it wasn’t meant to be and wouldn’t have worked out in the present either.
If I take a humorous approach to it, all I can say is, ‘what was I thinking?’ That maybe something extraordinary could happen, that I was meant to be rescued by someone I barely knew, when in fact I started rescuing everything that I represented and the new life I had barely started to live.
I sometimes think about Bryan and how we met, and the brief moments we shared. He wasn’t really a bad person. He was just someone who was different from me in so many ways in personality, life experiences, upbringing, and else that I’m certain now it never stood a chance of becoming anything.
And then there’s me. I always strive for in having achieving something as minimal as a friendship. That’s the semi-romantic side of me that wants to say, ‘something positive came out of this’.
If I look at that, then I can say that this guy came into my life because he was the type of person I needed to meet when I had just re-started this whole dating craziness.
He came, he gave, and then he left when the alarm went off and was time to go, that’s all. I have no regrets and that’s the way it should be.