The New M.E. Generation











{May 17, 2011}   Something About Me 23 – All comes around

When we got to the topic of love, we had to accept that there was sparks between us, probably more than we had before. Although I don’t remember it, the feeling was stronger this time around.

I found myself thinking about him all the time, waiting to receive a call, text or email from him. It was as if I was having a long distance relationship.

He became my friend again and I went as far as to trust him with my most personal secrets, something which I have not done with any other guy, or even with my closest friends.

I felt I finally found ‘the guy’, that someone who should had come into my life in the first place and stayed for good. But, why didn’t it happen previously?

“The last time we saw each other was before I graduated and left school,” said he. “I know we exchanged telephones and else, and spoke a few times afterwards, but at some point we lost complete contact with each other.

At that time I didn’t know what I was doing with my life, and I just wanted to get out of there. I stayed briefly around the area and then moved overseas for many years before coming back to the US. I basically disconnected from pretty much everything and everyone that related to school.”

“Even from me?” asked I. There was a brief pause on the call.

“Like I said, I just wanted to leave. And I don’t recall you showing interest in keeping in touch with me.”

“Because you probably told me of your plans beforehand and, who was I to stop you? I mean, I still had another year to go, and neither had an idea about the future.

Most likely I felt that the best thing for both of us was to let you go. And I did in such a way that I completely erased you from my memory.

That’s why I feel so sad inside and don’t remember because I blocked it so it wouldn’t hurt any more than it did.

I knew it was not meant for us to be together, and now you’re back, and I’m feeling all that I felt before, and still can’t have you either.

I don’t understand why life is doing this to me. You’re the only descent guy that has come to my life since my divorce, and it can’t happen yet again.”

Why can’t things be different for me? Why did he have to come back?

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