The New M.E. Generation











{October 7, 2013}   Looking Back 14 – The problem of problems

‘As in all relationships, it takes two people to make it happen,’ continued he. ‘In this case, she doesn’t want to stay in it. Plus, she’s behaving in certain ways as if we were still married. People tell me I’m stupid for allowing it. I’ve been nice to her so far, but when I start taking certain measures she’s not going to like it. That’s when things will get ugly.’

Wow, yes, it does sound that this ‘drama’ will get nastier than a nightttime Mexican soap opera.

I couldn’t stop thinking again at my own breakup and how his correlated with mine yet again.

It seems that this guy and I did everything that we could for the sake of our marriage, even when things got difficult.

I personally didn’t want to end mine because I believed in it and was committed to keeping my vows.

Unfortunately, my ‘x’ bailed out and the situations that he could have resolved from his part he let them stand. This caused such a rupture on our relationship there was no way to save it. I became useless for him even though he had ‘no complaints about me as a wife’.

He didn’t want to stay in the relationship any longer because people think that when you walk away from problems they instantly disappear or stop being that, a problem.

Regarding my breakup getting ugly, it sure did. I saw a side of my ‘x’ that sure wasn’t pretty, and all his humiliation and rejection created a creature totally unrecognizable to me.

I questioned myself for some time where did I go wrong. My mistake was that I allowed him to treat me in ways that were totally unacceptable.

It took many years to realize that the breakup was his entire fault and that I was the best thing that ever happened to him and he blew it.

I have a strong feeling, yet again, that this is the same for this other guy. The difference is I already surfed over the big waves and the bigger ones are starting to hit him.

But knowing how he is, he’ll apply the best ‘medicine’ that he knows and get over it. How much time will he need to heal? Well, that’s no day at the beach.

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