The New M.E. Generation

{October 5, 2015}   The Ex-Friend 4 – It changed everything

After my wedding and honeymoon, I settled with my then husband at the apartment he was living at. We married late November and before the end of year, we adopted a dog and celebrated our first Christmas.

I was still doing my post-grad. I had completed the coursework, but had to write a thesis to graduate.

My ‘X’ spouse’s contract had another year to go, so I took the time to advance my writing as much as possible and adapt to married life.

It was a challenging time; I didn’t know if I would be able to finish my studies or where we would be relocated.

I had always dreamt of leaving my home, but not to a place I didn’t know if I would like it or not. But was young and thought that if we both stuck together, we could overcome anything.

Because of all happening in my life, I lost even more communication with my then friend. His night shift made it hard for me to talk to him, even more now that I was married.

Plus, I had moved to another neighborhood, so I wasn’t visiting the pharmacy much. His mom would be my news link whenever I got my hair done.

A year later, my x’s contract ended, but instead of relocating to where his employer would decide to, he chose to pursue an opportunity abroad.

I wanted a change, but this was more than I expected. It all happened within a few months. We were to take all we had, including the dog, with us.

When arranging for the flight for both dog and me (my ex had left first), I purchased the pet crate and tickets with the airline my friend worked at.

I believed I called my friend to make sure I had made the right arrangements for my dog and make sure he traveling in cargo would be fine.

On the day I was to leave, I don’t know why, either I didn’t ask him to be there or he just didn’t show up because of his schedule. Even my ‘x’ wondered if he could be there.

All I remember was that my parents were there. My mom broke down in tears before I entered the gate and my dad calmed my dog before he was taken away.

I was nervous wreck and did my best not to show it, especially my mom. I kept looking around if by any chance my friend would appear.

Had he been there, he would probably have been in total control as usual, would have looked at me and said, “You’re going to be fine. Now, go with your husband”, meaning, “You’re all grown now; my work is done here and you need to be with the person you vowed to be with”.

It was one of those moments I needed his reassurance that he had confidence in me that I could overcome this or anything that came my way. He had always given me the guidance needed and never held me back.

So, why should I be afraid? Because our lives had greatly changed. Everything changes and sometimes as much effort one may put into things, other forces take away what always brought together to never bring you back. And when that happens, there’s nothing you can do to change it.

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