The New M.E. Generation

{January 30, 2017}   The Swipe 19 – Same old, same old

I called Bob the following Monday and Tuesday, but he didn’t answer my calls. He texted me saying that he was going through a cold and was asleep both nights I tried reaching him. Feels more like another ‘cold shoulder’ incident to me.

Wednesday came and I didn’t reach out to him. He was MIA from his part.

Thursday came and about half-way through my work afternoon, I get a text from him which read: “I am sure you are wondering what is up with me!!! I need to put us on hold for a while! I am going thru some personal issues. And need some time to let them pass. The next time we go out I would like to be the four of us. I am not asking you to wait for me. Just feel I should tell you.”

Oh boy, here comes Cameron #2 with the issues and contacting you at the best moment for them, but worse for you, to do so.

If Bob got to learn anything from me would be that he knew I wouldn’t make a scene at my job by calling him at work and raising hell over the phone, especially when having my GF’s husband sitting close to him.

But just like Cameron, he was also a coward, not having enough balls to tell me straight forward that he no longer wanted to have anything with me. My bestie was right, E.D. for sure.

I waited to end work for the day and went home, analyzing what my response to him would be. This guy may have tried to get away by entering the no-spin zone, but I just took my time to circle around in gravity until I was ready to land.

Once at my apartment, I edited the message on my phone until I felt it was the right one. Let’s say it was the calm before the storm.

“So nice of you to tell me over a text like millennials do and in the middle of work. You did and said exactly like the last guy I dated. We all have issues. You knew you had them. You just used me to alleviate some of the emotions while dealing with this. And I can meet with my friends on my own. I don’t need you for that.”

I then texted my bestie with his and my text. “Boom goes the dynamite”, replied my bestie.

“There’s something here that doesn’t fit,” continued I. “Maybe my GF’s husband said something to Bob that made him walk away, like, ‘Look, my wife and I know what Emma has gone through these past years. She is someone we care about and don’t want see her get hurt. You’re a great guy, but you’re not for her.”

“I don’t know,” said my bestie. “I think guys don’t sugar-coat anything to one another, but tend to keep things more to themselves than confronting their buddies. But don’t dwell on it. It’s done.”

Some weeks later my GF came over to my place for a drink. After some conversation, there was still no mention from her about Bob. Her husband happened to be traveling for work, so I took advantage of the moment to finally ask her.

“Didn’t your husband tell you that Bob and I had been going out?” asked I.

She gave me a look of ‘no, I didn’t’. I gave her a quick overview of what happened (including the selfie), to which she said something like, ‘I think his ex-wife is bipolar or something’, and that apparently he has been seeing other women. I guess his boat has traveled more miles than what I thought.

Just as we were in that talk, her husband called. “How come you didn’t tell me about Emma and Bob?”, asked she to her husband.

“My husband says that he did look at the picture, but didn’t see that it was you. He doesn’t pay attention to details. He never does,” said she upon finishing the call.

Now things were starting to make sense to me. But the part of him disappearing, not exactly there.

My GF tried to get to the bottom of it, basically making me look as the one who brought it upon myself. I didn’t tell her about the comment. She even questioned my lack of enthusiasm for the boat.

“If you sleep with them, they leave you. If you don’t sleep with them, they also leave you. And I’m not going to pretend anything. If I’ve had, then he would have said that I had lied to him and the outcome would have been the same,” said I.

Needless to say, she and I engaged in a discussion about men that almost escalated into an argument, which was totally ridiculous.

We couldn’t find a middle ground, so I literally raised my arms and said, “I don’t want to talk about this any longer.”

I didn’t wanted to talk about Bob, any guy before him, whether I was right or wrong, if I had acted well or not, if I was to blame for him dumping me, my past. It’s like all that baggage I had struggled with since becoming single decided to suddenly wash up shore.

I think my GF called me about an hour later after going home to apologize. “Emma, I’m sorry. I got carried away. You know I only want the best for you.”

“I know. And I’m not upset with you,” said I in a tone pretending to show I wasn’t taking it personal.

I listened to her, but in my mind I kept telling myself, ‘I’m not crying over this or anything else.”

The last I heard of Bob was on Christmas Day at my GF’s home. She referred him as Bobby, and can’t recall what she said about him. I gave her a look of ‘don’t care to know’. Quite honestly, I don’t give a shit.

This is just a repeated story that ended with a swipe left.



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