The New M.E. Generation











“Care to dispute? I’m listening,” said I. “From experience, whether you call them or not, behave well (or not) on the first date and else, afterwards most of them become MIA.

My girlfriend says that if you don’t impress them right away, they’re not interested in you for anything, not even a friendship. I think she’s right.”

“So you’re saying that men are not interest in you after that first date because you’re unable to impress them?” asked he.

“I don’t know what their problem is, but that’s pretty much what’s happening. Even if I make the effort of calling them, they don’t return my calls or want to go out again.”

“I just don’t get it. If you have been able to recover your personality, you shouldn’t be having this problem. It doesn’t make sense.

I wonder what aura you emit that make men want to take off. Maybe you’re trying too hard or feeling insecure.”

“I think it’s a combination of things. After been married for so long you have to figure out how to date again like when we did back in school.

More than trying too hard, I think it’s a trial and error. I have to keep on trying until I get it right.

Insecure? Sometimes because you don’t get why guys snob you. But I’ve learned not to take it personal or put the blame on me.”

“You were always kind of quiet in school, but smiling and in a good mood. If you’re not happy now with yourself and/or your life, it will hold you back to getting what you want. You need to get rid of the crap that won’t allow you to fly.

You’re still young and attractive, and should be living life to the fullest. And, you don’t need a guy to be in that good place. You do need to get your act together or you will never be happy in a relationship.”

“I know, I know. I’m working on it.”

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I couldn’t shake off my frustration so I decided to call Dina and get her advice on what to do. After I briefed her on what had happened, her tone of voice was one of no surprise at all.

“Better get used to it ‘cause that’s how it is,” said she.

“What do you mean?”

“That guys in general are like that. You meet one, you go out with them once, lucky if twice, and then you never hear from them again.

They don’t tell you anything, never bother to call back, or whatever other reason they might have. It all boils down that they are not interested.”

“But how can this person come up with any conclusions about me when we only had one conversation?”

“Maybe you said something that turned him off or, whatever. You know what, it has happened to me quite a few times before that it doesn’t affect me any more.

If I were you, I wouldn’t even bother calling again. I would let it rest.”

“But he was surprised and grateful that I called him and he said to give him a call back. I mean, there’s a possibility that something happened to him or  his mobile.”

“Of course anything’s possible. It’s possible that, yes, he was genuinely happy that you called, as well as that he lost interest in the middle of the conversation.

Even more, he told you to call him back to not hurt your feelings. The list goes on and on.”

“So if that is the case, why are you still seeing that guy?”

“Because I haven’t put my emotions into it yet, so when he decides to leave I won’t get hurt.”

“I don’t get you. If you know that he, like others, will eventually behave the same way, why keep at it?”

“I told you, I’m not getting emotionally involved. I’m just going with the flow. Mark my words, in the end, it will lead to nothing.”

I was even more confused than when Dina and I started talking.

I know she was right about them guys disappearing, which has also happened to me. But Christian sounded sincere when we spoke. I think that if he became uninterested, he would have communicated that to me in some way.

Now my frustration has gotten worse.

Now what?



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