The New M.E. Generation











“I promise I won’t bite,” said he while I kept considering his offer and sporting a poker face. Hell, this is not the first time I’ve heard this and won’t be the last.

I was torn as to what to do. I thought that if I declined, I would get upset later for not giving myself the opportunity of exposing myself to situations even though I’ve had them before.

Then, if I do decide to give it the go ahead and the results are bad, question is, which of the two will I regret the most? Even if I decide to go, that doesn’t guarantee that the outcome will be good.

“Fine, wine it is,” replied I.

I followed him in my car and his apartment wasn’t that far. I parked outside the building as instructed. It was one of those locations in the area I remember seeing going up every time I drove to work.

My insecurities sort of started to get activated. It’s not bad where I currently live, but it is an older structure and not as fancy as this one.

The apartment itself was not that big, but nice. It had 2 rooms, kitchen, living area, and balcony. He had a male roommate and the place was definitely a college/bachelor pad. At least it was a place that was mainly clean and organized, good enough to feel confident of safely drinking some wine from a glass he had.

I sat down on the sofa, which had in front a massive TV. It was a little bit intimidating looking at it. Not even growing up at home was there ever one this size and forget about those in college; the rooms could only accommodate so much. People had to basically sit very close to be able to view the screen.

Even if I presently had the money to buy one, I wouldn’t. I don’t see the value of owning something like this and prefer investing the money in something else that has more of a long-term value.

It also made me think, how does this guy (or maybe his roommate) get the money to buy it? I started feeling out of place and thinking this guy and I were really in 2 different worlds that were becoming more distant by the minute.

What the heck was I expecting? Sorry, I’m not in college any more and I’m not winning this battle of the sexes any time soon.

“Hey, you want to sit in the balcony?” asked he.

Good idea, perhaps a neutral zone is the next best move.

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A couple of weeks passed by after the ‘daughter’ incident and everything seemed to go back to normal, that is, when I stayed away from writing anything on his profile.

I was keeping it low as much as I could and was just putting posts which content was pretty plain and harmless. They pretty much reflected the sentiment of what other people would say.

I could see that there were other females posting, so I thought this all unintended attention would eventually go away. But that’s not what was happening.

I learned through an email of him that the wife and daughter were still wondering who I was. I couldn’t understand why me of all the other women.

But him saying that I was an old girlfriend, combined with my apparent good looks, I was standing out way too much.

To be honest here, I didn’t find myself being above the other women I saw on his profile.

I did make positive comments on his daughter’s photos. She has been blossoming into a beautiful lady and I was happy for him.

He had always been concerned about giving her a stable home environment and the love she really deserved, two situations he felt he didn’t have when growing up.

I know pictures may speak more than a thousand words, but can be easily deceiving, but my feeling was that his daughter was indeed growing up to be what he had worked so hard for.

But my other feeling was that his attention was more devoted to the daughter than the significant other. Mix that with my presence online and his past stories that things between them are not that well, and you have a conflict that all points to him.

It blew out of proportion in such a way that one day I got an email that I knew would inevitably happen.

‘Hey, I am going to unfriend you. My wife has been questioning much about you. Please don’t take it personal. I am still your friend and I hope we continue to be. I’m not cutting ties here completely, just for a while until things calm down. I know you will understand.’

When I read it, I was upset that I was going through this again, but now thinking that I was fed up of being looked at as if I was a bad person who is complicating other people’s lives.

I have arrived to such a point in my life personally and with guys that I really have no patience for situations like this, even when I know what the truth here is.

I mean, I still appreciate and feel for him, but my emotions towards him completely come to a halt. I have been dragging on this situation with him for far too long and it’s time to close this chapter and move on, just like he has done.

No tears, no regrets, no questioning of decisions; just keeping him as part of my past and leaving it there.



“It has to do with your relationship, isn’t it?” asked I.

His face look changed to one of more frustration.

“I don’t want to talk about it!” said he quickly.

“I’m not going to ask you anything else about it, but I was hoping there was at least some sort of improvement. So, what are you going or will do about it?”

“Right now I’m concentrating on my daughter. I want to give her the stable environment I never had when I was growing up.

I think when she goes off to college will be the time that I do anything. She will be old enough to understand that things between mom and dad are not doing well and we decided to move on.”

“But that’s four years away! That’s a huge sacrifice to do for someone else, especially putting your happiness on hold.

I guess that’s what raising a child is all about. We do our best to give them all that they need, and when they’re all grown up they tell us they wished we had pursued our lives as well.

If we had ended the relationship at a young age, they’ll spend the rest of their lives hating us for it, telling us we ruined their lives. It’s like a no-win situation.

It’s ironic though, you have what I want: a relationship, a home, family of my own. In it’s own twisted way we’re both unhappy and just don’t know how to make things better because we can’t.”

We kept talking for a while, but it was a bittersweet conversation.

Yep, life just sucks sometimes.



et cetera