The New M.E. Generation











“Hey, there’s a possibility of a job opening back in the state I swore I would never go back to,” said he in a call I received out of the blue.

“What? Are you serious?” asked I, more concerned about him going back to that place than the job actually happening.

“I contacted a guy I’ve worked with before that helped me get the position there the last time, as it seems he might be able to do it again. I filled out all the paperwork and waiting to get it all approved, etc.,” continued he. “I’ve been praying over this for many days and if this is where God wants me to go, then that it will be. Don’t know the reason why, but sooner or later I will.”

“Listen to me well; if you go back to there and get involved with that woman, I don’t want to hear it,” said I in an upsetting tone. In spite of all his complaints and bad remarks regarding his ex-girlfriend, to which I have listening to for about 2 years, I’ve seen before how people go back to toxic relationships, and with his behavior shifting so abruptly, combined with the denial that his time with the bitch was a total disaster, plus his religious fanaticism that had him in a delusional state that made him believe he could fix anything broken by just faith, making it a sure bet it would all repeat again.

It took a few months for all to get completed and off he went. He was again in a one-year contract, so considering the location and bad association with it, plus the failure in his one-month stint in the Pacific, I was holding my breath that at least he would find a way to stay there for the duration of the job.

His argument again was religious, which was still making me puke. I was sick of hearing about the endless hours praying at church, or that ‘someone else’ had made the decision for him or told him what to do. Oh, and he was strapping for money, of course.

Because he was financially bad, he went to live in a room at a buddy’s house of his to save some money until he could get a place of his own (“the Lord is good with me; everything is falling into place). Barf bag, please.

I sort of distanced from him shortly after he started working, not because I wanted him to concentrate all his efforts in what he was doing, but because I couldn’t stand any more how a ‘higher power’ was granting him all that he wanted and making all that he did seem so smooth and effortless; that he had achieved everything because of his faith and non-stop praying.

All that I wanted from him was to just shut up, work, and take a break from worrying again what the next step would be when the job ended.

Bonus if he comes back to visit his mom, invites me, and he is back to his old self.

Will ‘the power above’ work on my favor? Well, like he always said, “I’ll leave it in his hands.”

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The last time I saw my friend during college was on my Senior year. I don’t recall how it all happened, but he came to visit me.

I think he was on the area for an interview or simply decided to know my life in school the same way I had done with him.

I couldn’t get to the airport, so he rented a car and found his way to my dorm.

It was great seeing him. He was wearing a jacket (a habit that would repeat many times over) and was very happy to have made it.

My residence was an apartment and one of my roommates had brought a sofa, so it became his bed. Funny enough, this piece of furniture would become another item that would serve me well.

The memories of those few days are sketchy, but I took him to dinner to an Italian restaurant I loved.

During dinner we got up to date again about the future and, as always, he had a plan. He was checking stocks on certain airlines and according to what he was seeing and learning about the companies, he would then decide on which one to apply to.

He knew he would probably have to move if an opportunity occurred, but he was fine with it. He knew he couldn’t be that choosy if he wanted to make anything good of his aspiring career.

While at dinner, he mentioned to me that his maternal grandmother wasn’t doing well. All of a sudden, he slouched down in the chair, looked sideways and got really emotional to the brink of almost crying.

I had the chance of meeting her. She meant a lot to him because, after his parents’ divorce and his mom going back to work, the grandma was the one who basically raised him.

I was shocked at how vulnerable he became, as I had never seen him like this. He had always been the strong one for both, the one that never let anything bring him down.

I sat there, frozen, not knowing what to do. I suddenly reached out and grabbed his hand across the table.

But, unfortunately, he remained as he was. He didn’t acknowledge what I did or said anything to my remark of, ‘she’ll be fine’.

It was as if I wasn’t there, as in someone else in his life had surpassed me in every aspect, even if I was just a friend in a total different relationship with him.

His hand felt cold and distant, his demeanor one that I had never seen of him and got me confused.

But I didn’t give it much thought back then other than to consoling him was the right thing to do.

It would be a few decades later when many traits of his would resurface again with another woman in his life that would greatly alter the friendship I thought we had.

And it would be pretty much as in this moment, distant, instant and cold. Instead of holding hands, he used it against me, and other, to create a block that no universal force could break apart.



This guy returned my call around 3-4pm that Saturday. He sounded like he was running 100 miles a minute. He explained that on Saturday afternoons he works as a personal trainer on a gym and was still at that, but wanted to touch base with me before it got later in the day.

Well, that’s nice of him, I think. It was a weird feeling having so much politeness from a young guy like him. Wait, let me rethink this again. Many of the guys I’ve met started out as that, being well mannered and behaving the way I like guys to do.

But after the first encounter, their true beings slowly, and surely, emerge. Reality is they were very smart. They somehow managed to figure it out and mold their personas to make it appealing to me. It is so well crafted, I actually believe there is a possibility that I have finally met a good guy.

So, why am I fooling myself? This guy is probably trying to lure me into the sack. But I’ll give him credit that he works out and knows that if it’s such the case, he better have something worth my attention.

Hearing his voice felt fine. It was one of those occasions when you get a good vibe in the first few minutes of talking to someone.

The only thing that raised a red flag was that he had a ‘jumpy’ tone or talking perhaps a little too fast for me. But this is no surprise since his schedule is filled to the rim. He probably needs that adrenaline rush to be able to pull it all off.

He suggested meeting at 8pm at a bar of my choice. In other words, he was leaving it for me to decide.

I liked that because I was still keeping control of the situation. Meeting him up at the location is an example of that. And, of course, I was not going to put myself in a situation that I know I shouldn’t be.

But I lost control of my thoughts when he asked me what bar it would be. I couldn’t remember the last time I was in one with a guy all by myself.

And what would I talk about? What do I really have to say to him? Is this all going to end sort of bad like my other experiences?

Let’s calm down and control my anxiety level. Let me think about (or put my energy) into something else, like, what am I going to wear?

Now that’s a stressful situation!



et cetera