The New M.E. Generation











Just when I was getting used to the idea that this guy was away and that our friendship has experienced a change that would be put to the test over the next year, I get a totally unexpected call from him in the middle of the week.

People that know me know you never call me at work unless you have an immediate need to speak to me, or it means something really bad has happened.

And with this guy it was the same. So his call meant the second and I felt a bad vibe about it. First thing that came to mind was his mom.

“‘¿Todo bien?'” (Is all fine?) is what he would say and now I’m copying him. What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I just say things my own way? It’s ridiculous how much he’s engrained in me. “Something happened to your mom?” continued I.

“No my mom’s fine. I’m the one who’s not. Listen, I’m getting out of here. I already submitted my letter of resignation and will fly out in a couple of days,” said he.

“What? Why? Didn’t you just get there about a month ago? What happened? Are you sure about what you’re doing?”

“It’s a long story, but all I will say is that this is a toxic environment. It’s like in one of those mystery movies where you land at what you thought would be an oasis, and then you discover all the hidden horrors nobody told you about.

I made my decision quickly and there’s no turning back. I need to get out of here and the sooner the better. Got my ticket, I’m all packed up, and that’s it. Don’t want to be here no more,” continued he.

I was listening to him and couldn’t grasp what was happening. It’s like I was talking to a complete stranger. This was definitely not the guy I used to know. It could have been the most difficult situation for him, but he would always manage to turn things around and make them work.

That’s what I used to admire about him; he would overcome anything and come out victorious, even stronger as a person.

Now all I’m hearing is how bad everything is, how angry and bitter he has become, how life sucks and is being ungrateful to him, that the world and people have turned against him.

There was never a battle he wouldn’t win and no aftershock that would affect him for long. He would brush off the results of the experience and move on, and be more than ready for whatever else came his way.

He swallowed his pride on anything and kept his emotions under control. He would share them with you, but without putting too much emphasis into them.

Now he sounded like a spoiled child who ‘I want this and I want it now!’ type of attitude. A brat who closes his eyes and cover the ears when you try making any sense into him; someone who raises his voice and stumps the feet at the floor when things don’t go their way or others won’t comply with him.

I don’t know what ‘bit’ him on that location he’s at, but the high temperature on his voice was at boiling point. He may be shouting ‘toxic environment’, but there’s a lot more underlying drama in this low-budget movie that this spectator (me) has yet to see.

Worst part is, the first installment is not over yet and the sequel is about to start. What rating should this get? I’ll give it a ‘B’ as in ‘Bad’, really bad.

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I turned my chair to face the wall, so no one could see my tears flowing down my eyes. It was one of those moments when not even waterproof make-up could conceal the emotions that were pouring out.

It started getting so bad, I grabbed my shawl and wrapped it all the way to my nose. More than for warmth, the item became my mask and handkerchief.

“This year has been so difficult,” said I. “I’m still with no guy. Every one that I meet isn’t worth anything. This month would have been my 20-year anniversary.

I know the grass is never greener on the other side. But there are times when I just feel that my life sucks and won’t change for the better.

I’m grateful that I have many blessings. But I’m not asking for much. I’m a good person and don’t understand why I’m still single.

All I want is to settle down, have a family, and live a tranquil existence. Why can’t I just get that?”

“You will find someone,” said he. “You have to be patient.”

“How many times you’ve told me that and still nothing? At least you’re always with someone, for better or for worse.”

“That doesn’t mean I’m happy. And, no, right now I’m not with someone. I want to take a break.”

“You always say that too. When I turn around you’re back in being in a relationship.”

“I know; I’m a disaster. But I really want to be alone for a while. When Thanksgiving comes, I’m getting a bottle of champagne and drink it all alone at my place. Not interested in going to any parties or anything.”

“You don’t have to be so extreme. You can celebrate the holiday very low key with people that really care about you.”

“I’m not in the mood to be with anyone. How about you?”

“I’ll be with family. I mean, it’s good, but won’t help much that I’m so sad, angry, frustrated at so many things. I need an extraordinary experience to happen to me that will give me a new perspective and change everything that I am.”

“Things will get better for you.”

“When? I’m tired of waiting. I want it to happen already.”

Ivan and I talked for a few more minutes. It was a brief conversation as usual, but it was the first one that after talking to him I felt some relief.

After hanging up, I turned to face the computer again and luckily nobody saw or heard me while talking.

I quickly ran out into the bathroom to hide and chill out for a few minutes.

I could barely look at myself on the mirror. But turns out using the shawl as handkerchief saved some of my make-up, so I was able to fix it good enough that people wouldn’t notice my tears.

Once back at my desk, I realized I didn’t thank Ivan for listening, or that to remember he had (sort of) promised to meet me one day for drinks.

So, call him again? I’ll drink to that.



I don’t know how long I waited for his arrival, but it felt endless. He finally appeared and, true to his ‘surfer dude’ demeanor, he’s driving with the car windows down and playing music so loud, it could be heard blocks down.

He puts the volume down and I get in the car. I have a face that reads ‘my life sucks big time.’ On the other hand, he has a big smile on his face like we were instead heading to the beach to catch some waves.

“Wassup Emma?”

“Hey” is all I could say with the long ‘unhappy camper’ face I had.

The thing here is that my car had been leased just a few months back and I am very attached to it. My vehicle is like an extension of my personality to the point that I don’t let other people drive it unless necessary or I allow it to happen. The thought of a total stranger taking it away feels like a part of me went away with it as well.

“Oh c’mon, it’s not that bad!” Brian said. I kept looking at him with my pissed off face and made no additional comments.

Brian puts his face closer to mine and said, “You’re not taking this very well are you?” while laughing and opening his blue eyes as wide as possible.

I then turned my face and looked forward to finally speak my first full sentence since stepping into the car. “I need to get home first to get cash to pay. They’re not accepting credit cards at this time of the night.”

So off we went to make a first stop at my apartment to retrieve money I have saved in case this type of situation ever occurred to me.

We then continued to locate the tow-trucking company, which was located in an area I’ve definitely never been for how ghetto looking it was.

We get off the car at the company and I could see my car parked inside the lot through the gate. I’m so glad to see it! It’s as if it had been abducted and I’m finally rescuing it.

I took care of all the corresponding paperwork and payment. I then checked that there were no scratches or damages to the car and then drove it out where Brian was parked.

I rolled down my window. “Thanks so much, I appreciate it enormously,” I said to him.

“So, I guess you’re going home now?” he asked.
“Actually, I could really use a drink right now if I could. I’m still in a little bit of a bad mood,” I answered.
“I got beers at my place if you’re interested.”
“Are they cold?” I asked.
“Always.”
“I’ll drink to that. Lead the way please,” I concluded.



I found Dina and Melanie and they’re talking to two guys. They asked me about Edward and I told them he had gone home. The three of us decided to wait some more before finally leaving.

We finally decided to leave some time later, and as we started to walk out the venue, I noticed that the guys Dina and Melanie were talking to are accompanying them.

Well, this definitely sucks!

We all approached Melanie’s car, and before we aboard it, she wonders if we can all fit in it. “Hey, the more the merrier,” I said. I sat next to the door and looked out the window; I’m the only one here with no guy next to me and I feel like an idiot.

When I got back to my apartment, I sat down on the rug at the entrance of my room. I’m still wearing my costume.

It’s past 1am and I’m in desperate need to talk to somebody, but it’s too late to do so. All I was able to do was stare at the ceiling and cry. I was so miserable.

I’m mad at Edward, my life and everything else in between. I don’t remember for how long I sat there.

Some time later I changed my clothes and watched some TV before going to bed. I needed to figure out what to make of this night.

I couldn’t pay much attention to what I was watching, but at around 2am I finally concluded what’s going on with me: I’m not ready yet to get close with anybody or for a relationship. As hard as it sounded to tell myself this, I had to accept that this is my reality.

So what am I supposed to do now? For starters, I need to keep going out and enjoying myself, but without stressing over if I meet a guy or not. Maybe if I just let go of this issue I might actually end up meeting someone. All right, I’ll give it a try.

And what about Edward? I’ll take care of that tomorrow. It has been too much of a freaky night, and early morning, for me already.



et cetera