The New M.E. Generation











“Why are we having this conversation again?” asked I. “Why is this such a concern to you?” I gave this guy a very serious look. He gave me a blank stare back and didn’t respond immediately to my inquiry.

It was somewhat upsetting that he was sort of ‘laying the law’ when first, he barely knew me and, second, was trying to convince me that he was really knowledgeable about the topic.

And, besides, if there’s nothing to happen here, why the concern, or is it that? What is it that he’s really trying to tell me? Perhaps warn me?

Is it that maybe he doesn’t want me to have a distraction away from him or it has to do with my age, as in, ‘don’t put your time on something when you don’t have that’, meaning you’re not getting any younger?

“Just saying,” said he. “Don’t you think it would be much easier to find someone locally?”

“Like I told you before, I’ve tried that already and it hasn’t worked out the way I hoped for. I’m not going to stop trying and if going outside the box is a possibility, I will try that too.”

I don’t recall what else went down in the conversation. After dinner he helped me clean up and even sat down to watch TV in my living room in spite of previous his criticism regarding its size.

It wasn’t that late when he told me he had to go, as he had lots of homework for the next day. This sounded like the Cinderella story; what would he turn to when the clock strikes midnight? I wouldn’t be surprised he has other plans, like meeting up with another woman, but I was glad he was gone. The night has evolved as far as it should.

I finished the clean up and went to bed not really reviewing the night. But when I woke up, I felt a huge sense of emptiness and sadness.

I stayed in my bed, laying back, staring at the ceiling, considering the nature of my emotions. I was fine last night and now this.

I know nothing will happen here with this guy, that I need to experience life more, so why these emotions?

Simple, at the end of the day, I’m back where I started with this guy thing, without one.

I guess I already know what will happen next: we might see each other one last time, maybe text or talk a few more until all vanishes into oblivion by itself. I will stop communicating and so will he, and that will be it.

Been there, done that. What am I doing about it? Nothing. Next…!



A couple of weeks went by (I think) before we contacted each other again. I don’t know who did first and for what reason.

I have usually remembered the sequence of events related to previous dates. But, this time, there are just empty blanks on my mind.

If my memory serves me well, I would bet I text this guy the next day thanking him once again for the previous evening.

Overall, the date wasn’t extraordinary or bad, but good enough to apply my manners. I believe his are not the same as mine, but hopefully they will communicate how I would like to be treated.

I believe I text him on a Saturday just inquiring how he and his studies were doing. He replied that he had a friend in town that he was to take out with other friends. I told him that I was glad to hear and for him to enjoy the night.

The next time he resurfaced, he offered to come home and cook. When I read the text, I got surprised and anxious. I think it has been no more than 2 times that a guy has come over and done that in all these past years.

Even though I’m used to my space and doing all by myself, I know my social life should improve and doesn’t hurt someone else doing something for me once in a while. But allowing others in my home is like opening a door to my mind and emotions. And people taking control of the situation, including using my kitchen utensils, is something hard for me to let go off as silly as it may sound.

Also, I am a simple person. I don’t need expensive things to be comfortable. I own what I think I need, take care of it until it’s time to part of them, and like my surroundings to be clean and organized.

Because I consider myself a minimalist, I think once you step in and look around my residence you can define who I am as a person rather quickly. Of course, it all relies in what the other person’s frame of mind is, but hopefully their analysis of me should be a general positive one.

This guy proposed to bring all the food and cook. I only had to supply the drinks and kitchen. I don’t know who will be doing the cleaning afterwards, but the arrangement sounded fair.

The whole thing was to be happening that night, so I hurried to put my whole place together (as I always do, visitors or not) and go out to buy the drinks.

Then off to choose the clothes that completed the ‘look’ of the day.

Question is: will the universe serve me justice tonight?



The next day at work on a Friday I started thinking about how the situation had unfolded the day before.

I know I did the right thing by turning him down, but I also realized this was probably the last chance of ever seeing him again face to face.

Reality is, the only way to ever finalize the past and present was to confront him and all my emotions.

So, if getting to where he will be is not an option, how about telling him to make a first stop on my end, and then later he continues to his final destination?

‘Hey, I was thinking, how about if you came over first, maybe have some dinner, and then you go?’ text I.

It didn’t take long for him to reply. ‘I thought I needed to resolve my issues with my girlfriend,’ replied he.

‘I know, but this will probably be the last chance we have of seeing each other,’ said I.

‘Yeah, I could do that,’ said he. ‘What time do you get out of work?’

‘No later than 6:30 p.m. What time would you get here?’

‘Around 8:30-9 p.m. Text me your address so I can set it on my GPS.’

It was only about 12 p.m., so it meant he was to leave around 4 p.m. if he wanted to avoid Friday’s traffic jam, especially coming into my city.

I asked him to text me once he was on the road and subsequent locations as his trip advanced.

I kept on working as usual until around 4 p.m. when the local weather decided to work against me when it delivered massive amounts of rain.

It got so dark it looked like it was late at night. Damn, now this means traffic is really going to get bad for me and (hopefully not) for him.

I hurried to finish my work on time and rushed out the door at my usual leave time. The rain had stopped and everyone driving were doing the ‘are we there yet?’.

My plan was to get home, shower and wear something appropriate for the occasion or, better yet, something that really represented who I was and not what he probably still has stuck on his mind about me.

So, what’s is it going to be? How about high school sweetheart turned prom queen diva? Yeah, it’s personal and I’ve got the clothes and shoes to make it happen.



This guy disappeared off the radar, but not for very long.

That’s how he behaved, so when I started getting texts very late in the evening or really early morning, I wasn’t surprised at all. He would either send multiple messages or a very brief one. I would or would not respond to them depending on the day and time they were received.

Those late in the evening on a work week were usually those of ‘how are you?’ If I hadn’t gone to sleep yet, I would respond with a quick answer like ‘I’m fine, txs’.

If received during my sleep, I would not answer at all, not even the next day.

If anything happened during the weekend, he would text late Friday or Saturday evening with the ‘hey, what are you doing tonight?’ line. Even if I was ‘home alone’ with no plans, I would wait a while and then answer, ‘sorry out on a date’.

Now, those received early morning continued to be weird like, ‘listening to music here’, ‘have your apartment all set up?’ or ‘want to see you again’.

Those I would not read until I woke up. Seeing his name on my mobile was an eyesore. I would basically not answer.

It was sort of strange though that he wouldn’t continue his texts even after I responded to them. It’s like one minute you’re interested in me and then you’re not.

At moments I would laugh and others felt sorry for him because I think that after the wedding incident he hasn’t been able to score with any women and he’s probably wondering what the hell is going on with that.

It seems to me that he’s trying to have me as his next ‘trophy woman’ and finally break the streak.

Hmm, interesting. I never thought about that. But yet, who cares? It’s still not happening (as is him and me).



et cetera