The New M.E. Generation











{June 27, 2016}   The Ex-Friend 41 – I spy

I kept to myself after this conversation with the mom. My bestie, though, knew pretty much what was going on with this guy. She had managed by herself, or through others, how to find out the information she needed. Her tactics seemed taken out of a thriller novel.

There was also the situation that because my BFF used her credit card to finance all of his expenses before and after he left to the Pacific, she has to contact him every month to get payment from him.

“If it was me, I would have long gone from his life, but I’m stuck with this issue until he pays it off. Doing payments of $100 each will take forever to do so,” said she. “I’ve even told him he should get a loan to pay me in full to get this over with and I can disconnect from him as well.

He then tries to play with my emotions by saying, ‘I thought you and I were friends’, that ‘you know I’m in a tight financial situation’, ‘I don’t have a stable job right now’,  blah blah blah, even threaten that he won’t speak to me again if I get insistent on this.

But he wouldn’t dare do anything he says he will. He always said to me that ‘I am a very resourceful person’. He knows I have connections with people or ways to resolve things that would make his life miserable.

I remember when he broke up with the bitch and telling me that ‘she never did anything good for him and would have never accomplished in a year what I can in a day’.

Worst part is that sometimes he gives me a hard time to make a payment, or is delayed to do so, and when I text him about it he doesn’t reply, etc., only to find out he’s been vacationing with that bitch. How fucked up is it that he doesn’t have money to pay me, but does to travel, when I’m basically the one who made that possible for him, only to turn around and go back with that bitch who has never supported him financially?

And regarding his work situation, I’ve even gone as far as send him job links for him to apply to which he doesn’t. He keeps giving me all these excuses, keeps relying on his former ‘bro’ colleagues  (‘or putting in the Lord’s hands’ as he says) to find a job for him, or does nothing at all. No wonder when his contract expires he’s jobless.

I quickly tell him that ‘help yourself and God will help you’, that sitting his ass in the couch and creating a dent on it is not going to do anything for him, that he keeps ignoring the signs life is throwing at him that he, and only him, is the one to blame for his outcomes.

He’s quick to text all this bible passages with religious emoticons, trying to make me feel guilty about what I’ve said or point the finger at me. But I put him down, and in his place, each and every time. I’m not letting him get off the hook that easily. Not on my watch.”

“Girl, you’re my hero,” said I. Even more, she will be the one that takes him down. All things come around and when they do, the karma destined to him will hit him back. And when that happens I will be ‘sitting at my balcony, staring at my enemies walk by’ with a nice cold drink at hand, watching the action unfold like in any good movie.

“Women are more dangerous than shotguns” (The Godfather). Yes we are (my bestie and me, that is).

 

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What I remember next was that he had the help from a former colleague in moving out of the apartment and placing his belongings in the storage spaces.

I believed he then made the trip to his mom’s to leave one of the cars with her; the third one would stay with a couple friends of his.

I don’t recall if I saw him before he left to the Pacific. If I did, I probably got teary eyed when saying good-bye while giving him a hug, liked I’ve always done, when I knew it would be long before I saw him again.

I now look back and can’t believe how emotional I kept getting for him when he was showing the opposite feelings for me. I was so into keeping the friendship that I was allowing him to treat me like crap.

Yes, I was afraid of losing the only thing left that mattered to me, gave me security, a sense of self, anything and everything I relied on to have.

But unfortunately, when you place others before yourself, especially those who don’t deserve or haven’t earned it, they’re going to treat you badly.

And I’ve had this experience already happen with many others (including that person I was married with), so why was I in denial when reality was standing there right before me? Why was I being blind when he was showing his true colors?

If I didn’t get to see him and instead spoke with him on the phone, I probably got equally emotional, but didn’t say much about it. I would again have placed him first and not add additional pressure on him that he already had, or so I thought.

My next recollection of events was that he finally took flight and was posting every detail of his travel tagged with religious emoticons and thoughts.

It went down to something like this: he sat on the plane’s window taking photos of the sky, for example, and write, “thank you Lord for this opportunity as you’re with me all the way”. His favorite emoticon was of two hands together in prayer, which he used all the time on social media and texts, even if the event didn’t have a religious connection.

Or a post like, “look at that water that’s waiting for me down there and none of you will get to enjoy.”

In essence, he was trying to convey that he was headed to paradise and that his decision to go there was because the One above told him to, that ‘this is where he wants me to be right now, even though I don’t have an explanation as to the why of it.’

As the posts continued, they became too much for me. I felt like sticking my hand down the throat and puke at his absurdity. It was the same rhetoric over and over, like he needed continuous confirmation about anything that embodied him.

What it really sounded to me was that ‘the Man is giving me everything that I need because I am kissing butt big time to secure my place in the afterlife, which I know I have, and none of you are getting’.

He may be thankful of all the powers he supposedly was gifted from heaven, but it was clear as the blue sky that it was all about ‘me, me, me’, as in ‘me’ is better than you, ‘me’ gets all that I want, ‘me’ knows better than you, ‘me’ is untouchable ‘cause I got Him on my side and you don’t’.

He may have felt he was on top of the world and able to conquer it all, but his life was headed towards the worst transatlantic disaster he would experience.

Let’s say it certainly wasn’t going to be a day at the beach and would require more than his two hands held together to get a grab of it.

In other words, you never know what the tide might bring in, or like they say in aviation lingo, hold on tight to your seat, brace for impact, and hold your breath, ’cause you’re going down, down, down.



et cetera