The New M.E. Generation











Needless to say, our friendship was what everyone would say it would never be: real. There’s always been the notion that just a friendship between a man and woman will never stay like that. But it did.

We both had romantic relationships during high school, to which we respected and supported of. There was never jealously or intervened as to how we should deal with it.

He was aware of some details of the inside’s of mine as I would consult him, and I would because I had confidence he would suggest what would be beneficial for me and not for him. He never once strayed me so I would end up with him.

I showed my respect towards his relationship as well. I wouldn’t ask much about it and as long as I knew it was doing well, I would be the same. Besides, because I felt he was doing right for me, I was confident he would do the same for himself.

We had such a strong bond that even my BF at the time (who all knew each other from school) realized that if he wanted to be with me, he had to accept our friendship. I was never shy of talking about him and with time my BF realized my other friend was no threat.

My BF eventually learned to respect our friendship and even went to him at one time for advice when things were not quite there. Thing was, my BF was away in college and the long distance was obviously distancing us, so my BF started fearing he would loose me.

According to my other friend, my BF went to the pharmacy and asked him to have a private chat. Upon my BF saying about the challenges the relationship was having and me going away, my friend replied with these transcending words: “Don’t pressure Emma too much because if you do, she might slip away like sand between your fingers”.

When my friend told me this story during his last encounters with me, I got surprised to what extent my BF had gone for to not loose me. But as always, my friend was right on point as to how well he knew me.

Even more, he shed light on a personal trait: being pressured too much into something has never worked well with me. I tolerate it, but eventually disconnect or walk away. I tend to avoid the confrontation and if I do, I just explode, and then things get really nasty.

As I have said before, sounds familiar? Why is it that I seem to have forgotten plenty, but some things just remain the same?

Is this good or bad? Don’t know. Maybe it’s a half and half, good when it works on your favor, bad when it doesn’t.

What will I do about it? I’m thinking.

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A long weekend was soon approaching and Madelyn wanted to meet with me somewhere in the states. I quickly started researching ideas that were affordable and not that far away.

But because of the date, costs were obviously up from what they normally are, and the only way to make it more manageable was to try to add people to the trip.

Dina has already made other plans, and Alex was the only other option I could think about. I know I’m talking about sharing a room with a guy. But he and I have already known each other for some time, and felt confident Alex would behave accordingly. And, I know Madelyn trusted my judgment, and would be fine with her.

Of course, I spoke with her first and then to Alex who I knew had no plans for that weekend and was without his kids as well. He greatly appreciated my invitation and felt I cared about him being alone during those days.

I kept with the planning, but the more I tried to find a viable alternative, the more complicated it got for various reasons. Things really went from bad to worse when Madelyn expressed that the options available were too expensive and was going to ‘bail out.’ Then Alex ‘dropped the bomb’ on me, and I mean a really big one.

“If I go on this trip with or without your friend, I will only do so as your boyfriend.”

Holy! What? Say again? Where did that come from? What’s happening here? Did I hear right? Something inside of me hit the ‘mute’ button while my mind was trying to decode the message received.

“Remember that night at the pizza place?” asked he. “Something happened there that made me look at you differently. Right now I see you more than a friend, but as someone whom I would like to have a romantic relationship with. So, like I said, I will go on this trip only as your boyfriend.”

(Emma, say something!) “I don’t know what to tell you. I really had no sense that you had other feelings for me. You have to give me a chance to internalize this situation.”

Translation: I need to speak to Madelyn, now!



et cetera