The New M.E. Generation











After my last attempts to meet guys online (please see The Swipe), I did take a break from my search. As much as I know that ‘mejor sola que mal acompañada’ (better alone than in bad company), it’s still bothersome after all these years not having experienced a serious relationship.

Yes, it hit me hard, and got me down for many days. Even having conversations with my bff’s only helped temporarily. Bottom line is, I envisioned my present in a much different way.

For that I’ve tried to keep myself busy so I don’t think about it. And started doing something new to approach what I was feeling.

It was the start of a work week and the traffic was somewhat congested. Every time I hit a red light, I looked around people in their vehicles to check out what they were doing.

There’s always some woman putting her makeup on, another was still wearing her curlers, and a guy was using an electric shaver for at least 3 lights long.

Others were obviously looking at the phone talking or texting, all totally unaware of their surroundings. I did a small experiment of making funny faces, even doing my version of carpool karaoke, and nobody noticed. It was so bad the disconnect they had with the world, I bet you had I done something politically incorrect through the window, still no one would have paid attention.

All I could was laugh, which was good, and congratulate myself for not being co-dependant on a device of any kind.

As my drive continued, I looked around at the sky, train, stores, and other things we all take for granted, and actually appreciated them.

I then said to myself, “I will give thanks for all the good I have: my job, family, home, health, those people who give me so much. Even the ones who were present for the time that they had to, I’m also grateful. Last, but not least, whoever falls under my ‘persona non grata’ list, I release you.”

Yes, I do believe that when some people (can be male friends, besties, love interests, etc.) are no longer with you in whatever capacity, is because they were meant to be when you needed the most. Sometimes they go into another direction for reasons that have nothing to do with you; sometimes what you had together has run its course and there’s not much in common any more; sometimes it’s us who realize that as much as we may appreciate the other person, it’s best that we step away for own good, and hopefully for the other one as well.

Those in ‘the list’ range from anyone who have used or hurt me, to those that is better not even thinking about them at all.

You can say my thoughts were a ‘waiting to exhale’ moment, but they did wonders to my commute that morning.

If I’m not laughing at people, I then look at license plates with a coded message and try to decipher them. If I like it, I take a photo and share it on my profile. Some are pretty straight forward; others not even my social media friends can figure out.

It was on a Tuesday morning when I did the above-mentioned exercise again; it gave me some relief, but was still feeling down. I then looked up and thought, ‘would it be too much to ask for a little divine intervention on this matter?’

About 10 minutes went by, when I was driving on the middle lane and notice a familiar plate: LED ZEP1. ‘OMG, there it is!’, I thought to myself.

This was like the third time I’ve seen it. On the first one, the car was to my left, and every time I tried to take a photo, the light turned green.

When I was almost side by side with the vehicle, I notice a man with white hair inside smiling at me. He was probably laughing at my attempts to take a photo at such a limited visual angle. I kept trying, but wasn’t working.

The guy kept looking at me. He seemed way older than me, so I thought maybe he was one of the band members? I mean, it’s a known fact that there’s many celebrities living in my city.

In spite of getting a semi-descent shot, I gave the guy a smile back and said ‘thank you’.

Second time I was again in the center lane and LZ1 got right in front of me. ‘Yes! Got the shot!’

And now, I wanted to say hi to the guy and hopefully even strike a conversation. Who knows, maybe I’ve been riding next to a music legend and didn’t even know it. Hit it!

 

 

 

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It was mid morning when I received a call to my mobile. It was one of those totally unexpected moments that you just wonder who the heck it might be on this particular time and date.

I personally don’t like this type of calls because I don’t get that many and I always think something bad has happened.

I looked at the caller ID, and, is it possible? It’s Ivan!

“Hey,” said he as he had always greeted me.

“Hey, you. What’s the purpose of this ‘courtesy call’?”

“Nothing; was just in the area and thought about calling you.”

Really? Wonder what exactly motivated him to call me.

“So, what’s going on with you?” asked I.

“Not much. Working a lot. Have not been feeling well lately. How about you? What have you done lately?”

Besides the fact that I have totally taken you out of my life, everything else is fine. “Not much. Always keeping myself busy. Life is pretty straight forward as usual.”

The conversation did not have a lot of substance, and there were some gaps of time between each other’s comments.

I sensed that he wanted to say something right then when he called. This was not the usual ‘how are you doing?’ dull call. I kept thinking to myself, ‘Ivan, what exactly is it that you want?’

It was like a telepathy effect when he finally revealed himself. “Listen, why don’t we go for a drink next Monday?”

“Monday? It’s Wednesday. You mean to tell me you don’t have any free time between now and then?” asked I.

“The thing is that my employer is doing some redecorating on her home and I’m in charge of it.”

His situation is so worn out. If it’s not a big party at the residence, it’s an event in the city. Or if she decides to take a trip around the world, he still has to work until the late night because he’s responsible for anything pertaining to her existence, weekends included.

Just thinking about it makes me exhausted. But I’m not buying his call. I have a feeling he had been dating someone else since I last heard from him, and that person ended dumping him.

Now that he is alone again, he thought about approaching me the way it all originally happened, having drinks.

That’s the reason behind his low-key call. He probably realized that it was a mistake not pursuing me any further, and now he wants to win me back some way. It has not been that long since I last heard from him, but I’ve moved on, and grown, a lot. And I’m not keeping quiet about what I’m thinking.

“That’s nothing new to hear. Tell me something I don’t know about, like, your love life.” I definitely put him on a tough spot.

“Ah, not much. Some dates here and there. Not a lot of time for that, you know that.” (So why are you calling me?) “I did get to go home though.”

“I remember, for your high school reunion. You said you would call me before you left,” said I.

There was another pause during the call. He just didn’t know what to say. But I didn’t care. I wanted him to hear that I haven’t been sitting around waiting for him to come back to my life.

And in regards to his remark that he wants to go for a drink next week, I’m not loosing sleep over it. I’ll be very surprised if he calls, and, if he does, I’m not jumping into my car and dealing with traffic like the first time I met him. If he wants to see me, he will have to come to me, that’s if I feel like meeting up with him.

“Listen, I’m in the middle of something. So I guess we will talk next week?” asked I.

‘Jerk’ is all I could think about when I hung up. I went back to what I was doing before and Ivan disappeared from my mind. After all, that’s what he is in my life right now; non-existent.



et cetera