The New M.E. Generation











A long weekend was soon approaching and Madelyn wanted to meet with me somewhere in the states. I quickly started researching ideas that were affordable and not that far away.

But because of the date, costs were obviously up from what they normally are, and the only way to make it more manageable was to try to add people to the trip.

Dina has already made other plans, and Alex was the only other option I could think about. I know I’m talking about sharing a room with a guy. But he and I have already known each other for some time, and felt confident Alex would behave accordingly. And, I know Madelyn trusted my judgment, and would be fine with her.

Of course, I spoke with her first and then to Alex who I knew had no plans for that weekend and was without his kids as well. He greatly appreciated my invitation and felt I cared about him being alone during those days.

I kept with the planning, but the more I tried to find a viable alternative, the more complicated it got for various reasons. Things really went from bad to worse when Madelyn expressed that the options available were too expensive and was going to ‘bail out.’ Then Alex ‘dropped the bomb’ on me, and I mean a really big one.

“If I go on this trip with or without your friend, I will only do so as your boyfriend.”

Holy! What? Say again? Where did that come from? What’s happening here? Did I hear right? Something inside of me hit the ‘mute’ button while my mind was trying to decode the message received.

“Remember that night at the pizza place?” asked he. “Something happened there that made me look at you differently. Right now I see you more than a friend, but as someone whom I would like to have a romantic relationship with. So, like I said, I will go on this trip only as your boyfriend.”

(Emma, say something!) “I don’t know what to tell you. I really had no sense that you had other feelings for me. You have to give me a chance to internalize this situation.”

Translation: I need to speak to Madelyn, now!

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“Sorry that my girlfriend did that of pushing you over here,” said I.

“That’s ok. The one I really wanted to talk to is you,” said the guy, who introduced himself as Jesse.

Oh, no, here we go again with the cougar thing. I don’t know his age yet, but, by just looking at him, I knew he was younger than me and not by just a few years.

“So, are you still in college break or what? My girlfriend said you’re like, 21?”

“23. I’m done with college. Now I’m part of the corporate world. How about you? What’s your age?”

“How old do you think I am?”

He took another look at me from head to toe. “I would say no more than 32.”

“Yeah, that’s it. I’m 32.” (What? Thought I would give the real one away?)

But this wasn’t exactly the right move. Because this was not an issue with him, he became more interested in me. And I’m not for some reason.

He kept saying how beautiful he thought I was, and that any man would be happy to have a woman like me (starting with him). Even learning that I was divorced didn’t scare him away.

I couldn’t help feeling flattered by his remarks since you don’t get that every day. But my previous ‘cougar moments’ didn’t lead to anything long-term.

I know one should never use the past as a comparison and that there are positive things that I’ve gained from these experiences.

But now I feel like ‘been there, done that.’ As of today, I am in a ‘happy place’ and don’t feel the need to ‘go on a guy hunt’ yet again, not even for the fun of it or ‘for the love of the art.’

I know I need to let this ‘cub’ go away, but I’ve never done that. Dina and Madelyn have been the experts at this.

Holy, getting rid of a guy! How does it go?



After that phone call that almost ended in disastrous manner, I wasn’t thinking much about Jeffrey. The incident came at a really bad time for me.

Because of what I was going through, my mind and emotions were not coordinated as they should have.

I was very self-conscious of all I was saying and doing. But, really, who cared? I was completely alone and the result of what had happened was due to my newfound inexperience of dating.

On the other hand, what if this cougar actually had a positive effect on this guy? (What?) Yes, let’s think this over.

I did touch a nerve on him, which could eventually make him make a decision on his situation. There’s two options for him: one, leave things as they were (or do nothing about it); two, decided to end the relationship and restart his life again.

Hmm, wonder if I’ll get an answer for that. And that will only occur if he comes again into the picture.

What? You think I should be looking for him? Honestly, right now, this is the least of my concerns.



I finally called Ricky back.

Madelyn was right. What’s all the fuzz I’ve made over a phone call? Plus, I’m also probably right. For sure he’s inquiring on the whereabouts of his artwork. All I need to do is make the call and speak to him in a manner that shows that my life is doing well, which it is.

“Ricky, hi, it’s Emma. I believe you tried to call me?” asked I in a calm tone.

“Emma!! How are you??” (I was correct; he was buzzed.)

“Life’s good. How about you? You sound very cheery.”

“Yeah, I had a couple of glasses of wine.” (Glasses or bottles?)

“And you called because…” I then asked.

“I moved into a new place and my walls are kind of bear, so I was hoping to get back my artwork.”

“Well, I had promised to keep it as ‘a loan’ and be returned whenever you asked to,” said I. “When were you thinking of picking it up?”

“In a couple of days.”

“I’ll tell you this, I’m about to leave town for a week. But I will give you a call once I come back and we’ll schedule a day. You can call me when you get to my building and I’ll bring it down to your car.” (What? You thought that I would actually invite you back to my apartment? Noooo. I know better than that by now.)

I sensed that Ricky’s buzz suddenly fizzled. “Ok, please do. Bye.”

I was now the one with a natural buzz. I don’t know how that comment came about, but it was great! It was like the ‘slap in the face’ that this experience needed to put it to rest.

And you know what, I feel good!



et cetera